What a good question! There are times when I think I have a complete understanding on who I’m dealing with when it comes to my faith. And then there are times I’m lost.
Have you ever taken a quiz and thought “No worries, I got this?” Then, bam! Nope, your knowledge isn’t as on-point as you thought. Well, when it comes to religion I don’t have that thought; I can’t even pretend to front either. Prime example, I went to Bible study for the first time in my life and realized “Wow I haven’t got a clue.” It was actually funny to me because I went to Sunday school as a child and colored more pictures of Christ than I can remember. I watched Bible story cartoons with my kids and I attempted to read the Bible on my own. None of this helped me with my first quiz. It was for fun and I enjoyed listening to the answers but there was that lil voice telling me “Girl you need to get with it.”
I go to church and we were asked “Do you know him?” Not directly. Still, to have a question like that put out into living air…amazing! Besides the thought that he knew me before I was a twinkle in my daddy’s eye boggles the mind. I get that he has a plan for me; I can wrap my mind around that but to be a good steward and learn patience to follow. Well, that’s where my human nature (which I’ve come to follow without question) gets in the way.
If a person were to come up to me and ask me “Do you believe in God?” I’d answer without hesitation. But can I testify for him or about him? Yeah, I guess I could because he’s brought me through some tough times and I thank him till this day for bringing me through. Still, do I share that? Not really. My life is my life and there are very few people out there that can say “Yeah, I know Sheila.” Mind you, that’s not a big deal because I’m only one of many in an everyday crowd, but our Lord and Savior – that’s so different. I know he’s made everything I see. I’m amazed at his ability to tell the sea to “Stop right there!” When the Pastor said that Sunday my soul shook and you know what, it felt so good! Crazy, I know, but there’s something about the word now that I thrive for. It’s like breathing.
City Church has pointed out my desire to learn, or did I just walk into this house of worship to be awakened? I’m not sure but I can say this without pause on my part, I want to know him! I want to be that voice that helps someone see there’s a better way. I want to raise my children on a path that they won’t depart from. First, I need to know him. I NEED to KNOW and UNDERSTAND exactly who I’m dealing with! Right now I can’t say with confidence that I know him, but I will shout it from the rafters that I’m learning!